The goal of effective helping is the discovery of strength
The potential for growth in difficult circumstances is a fundamental principle for effective helping. Instead of seeing Friends who are suffering heartache as weak, we could instead recognize that they have potential strength that can be aroused and put into action. The word comfort is from the Latin cum forte meaning “with strength.” Our response can provide the support that enables Friends to work through strong emotions. As they calm down, they gain insight into the problem and make better decisions. As they move forward, they gain self-confidence.
                                
We do not empower Friends. Our help reveals the power that already resides in them. We participate in the helping relationship as both partners and learners. The relationship is between equals, not superiors and inferiors. We have our own troubles too. Effective helpers are not arrogant and patronizing. They do not give advice or dispense superficial clichés.

Our goal is to share the journey, inspire hope, and encourage movement forward in response to loss.

7

Growth Through Adversity