Accept beneficial emotional expression
If Friends say something like, “I’m so sorry for crying,” we can respond by affirming the importance of honest emotions. Tears are a tribute to the significance of the loss. We can also thank the person for feeling comfortable enough with us to express strong emotions. Have a box of tissues handy for someone who cries. Having water available is also helpful. Don’t try to stop Friends from crying by providing false reassurance. We should never say, “I know how you feel,” even if we think we do.
When we accept emotional expression, we might find an increase in its intensity. The experience of another person’s compassion can provide a powerful release. At these moments, we can provide the strength for Friends to lean on. We might have to respond as we did at the Threshold.
However, we should not accept harmful emotional expression. We can understand the origin of uncontrollable emotion in a traumatic loss. Even so, we may have to protect Friends from themselves. This may require a mental health intervention. |