The trigger as a part of the pattern
Consider the trigger for the anger. Is one type of situation or person a frequent trigger of anger? For example, getting your child ready for school in the morning might be a frequent frustration for you. Knowing there is a predictable source of anger can be helpful. The key is to find the true source.
A construction worker and a friend always have lunch together on one of the high beams of the building they are putting up. For the past several days, the worker has opened his lunch box, taken out the sandwich, and shouted, "Peanut Butter! Not again!" Then he throws the sandwich into the air to fall far below. After hearing several days of these complaints, his friend finally runs out of patience. "Sammy! Why don't you tell your wife to pack you something else for lunch?" Sammy replies, "Leave my wife out of this! I make my own sandwiches!"
Next: Evaluating anger