The Friend is a Person
The philosopher Martin Buber talked about two distinct ways of relating to others: as I-Thou(clicking opens a new browser window) or as I-It. When we relate to others as an It, we don’t really care about their humanity, their feelings or aspirations, or their real experience. The person who is an It is treated like an object. For example, the bored and impatient caseworker handing out benefit checks to clients may treat the person sitting across from her as an It. The customer at the supermarket is likely to treat the cashier as an It (and visa versa).

I-Thou is very different. When we treat others as a Thou, we respond to them as a Friend, a real human being who has feelings and deserves respect.

3

What is a Friend?